You want the truth? Well, here it is. Eventually, you forget it all. First, you forget everything you learned – the dates of wars and Pythagorean theorem. You especially forget everything you didn’t really learn, but just memorized the night before. You forget the names of all but one or two of your favorite teachers; and eventually you forget those, too. You forget your junior year class schedule and where you used to sit, and your best friend’s home phone number and the lyrics to that song you must have played a million times. And eventually, but slowly, you forget your humiliations – even the ones that seemed indelible just fade away. You forget who was cool and who was not, who was pretty, smart, athletic, and not. Who went to a good college, who threw the best parties, who had the most friends – you forget all of them. Even the ones you said you loved, and the ones you actually did. They’re the last to go. And once you’ve forgotten enough, you love someone else.

It’s times like these that test my faith

A God a faithless God like this

How could he do this to you

The one I love

I have to block out thoughts of you

Because those thoughts come along with anger

Will you die 

Will you live

Will God take you from me

I’m not done learning

How can God steal you

You’re mine

My daddy

And even if he doesn’t tomorrow

What about next week

Month

Year

I need you there

I can’t imagine a life without you

Because this isn’t just a breakup

It’s a shattering a

Beating

Bruising

Broken 

Battered

I’ve never had a life

That I didn’t share with you

I’m so full of rage

But I don’t know what kind

I don’t know why I take it out on you

It’s like some sick fucking joke right?

The sick man makes me mad?

But it’s not  you

It’s him

It’s the reason you have this stupid fucking disease

It’s not fair

He’s a fake

He’s a liar

He’s a thief

How can I believe in something so evil

Posing as “The Great Beyond”

People think I’m upset…

Truth be told

They don’t know the half of it

I feel like a sledge hammer has been taken to my world

Just like the accident

When my car shattered

That’s how my life feels

Scattered, like a jig saw

Pieces are disappearing

As soon as I pick one up

Another goes missing

And I can’t put them together

But the eternal clock ticks on

And time drains from the world

But I still remain

Lonely

Broken 

Upset

Confused

FUCK THIS

I can’t take it

I can’t live like a broken person

Like a broken person…

I am a broken person

A cracked record

Repeat 

Repeat

One awful

After another

You see now dad?

You can’t leave me here…

Not by myself

I can’t be by myself

I can’t stand myself